My therapy group is in the emotional regulation section of DBT. We are learning the “build positive experiences” skill. Basically, you are supposed to insert a positive experience in your day, be it buying a top you want, listening to music you like, going to see a movie or even going for a walk. I was absolutely SHOCKED to learn that “normal” people have DOZENS of positive experiences inserted into their days, and they don’t even have to try! It just happens for them! I have to actively think and plan my day to add positive experiences, since it doesn’t come naturally to me right now.
When I got home from work, Jay and I took the dog to a nearby park. Jay put a long rope leash on him so that the dog could run and frolic in the park, but still be under our control. We walked around the park for about 40 minutes. That was a positive experience for me.
After we got home, Jay built a pretty fire in the backyard. We just sat in front of it, enjoying the view and each other’s company. We had a very pleasant conversation. I roasted marshmallows. The dog ran around like a fool. That was a positive experience for me.
It’s kind of nice to make a point to do things you enjoy. It made me feel very good. I’m thankful that I have a husband who will do these things for me. Maybe tomorrow will be a good day, too.