Well, it’s official: We will be leaving Little Rock on Thanksgiving to begin our journey to Wild Wonderful West Virginia. I was thinking on the drive home from work yesterday, and I realized, much to my surprise, that there were some things I was going to miss about Little Rock. Not many things. I doubt I can churn out a list of 20 things I will miss, like the list of things I won’t miss, but I’ll give it try.
1) Liquor stores on literally every corner: I love that you don’t have to drive too far here to find a liquor store. Not only are there liquor stores everywhere, but they are DRIVE THROUGH!! I love that! I had never experienced drive through liquor stores before. If they are not in West Virginia, I know I will definitely miss them. I may cry myself to sleep over the loss of those lovely drive through liquor stores.
2) The straight roads: Jay and I have finally been able to start taking drives again. We drove around Virginia all the time when we first got married. The roads in Virginia are curvy and steep. They can be hard to manage if you aren’t used to them. I am so happy that the roads in Arkansas are fairly straight. Now I don’t have to worry about focusing so much on steering through a sharp turn or curvy road, and I can see more of the beautiful scenery.
3) The lack of wildlife: Little Rock may have bugs galore, but they don’t have a lot of animals wandering the roads. Well, expect for the stray dogs. I was talking more about deer, though. In Virginia (and I’m sure it will be the same in West Virginia) I had to be constantly on guard for deer. I remember driving through the woods with high levels of anxiety, waiting for deer to jump in front of my vehicle. In Little Rock, even though you often drive through the woods or what appears to be the middle of nowhere, deer are not a big concern. I think I have seen two deer in the three years I’ve been here. There also aren’t cows all over the place. One would hear about car accidents involving cows from time to time in Virginia. Not a problem in Little Rock. In fact, I have only seen one herd of cows since I’ve been here, and that was last weekend.
4) The lousy work ethic: I have to say, working for a series of bosses who are used to the poor attitude of employees has really been a plus for me. I’m usually a very good employee. I come in on time or early, I stay late if need be, and when at work, I actually WORK. I have been given a lot of freedom while working various positions in Little Rock. A supervisor I had here said that he couldn’t expect people to show up for work, come in on time, or be productive while there because the pay was so low. Great! I would take long breaks there to run personal errands. If I wanted to sleep a little later, I wasn’t worried about showing up to work late. I went in hung over many a time. Yeah, I think I’m going to miss the overall lazy attitude of the employees here. It made me look good!
5) The lack of police coverage: For a place that ranks significantly higher than the national average for violent crimes, there are a surprisingly low number of police officers roaming the town. Occasionally I’ll see a state trooper on the highway, but the local boys rarely come out. I guess you can’t blame them with all the Shipley’s Donuts in Little Rock. I don’t mind, though. Not at all.
6) The loose vehicle and driving laws: Not only is a car inspection NOT required in Arkansas, the cops down here (at least in Little Rock) don’t care too much about enforcing the vehicle laws they DO have. Jay and I drove around for FOUR MONTHS on dead Virginia license plates when we first moved to Arkansas. The cops didn’t care about our vehicle being in accordance with Arkansas state law, so we didn’t, either. Also, the cops pretty much let you do whatever you want as far as driving. People here park on the wrong side of the street facing the wrong direction. They will be driving down the road, on the right as they should, and decide to pull over on the LEFT, facing oncoming traffic. They also park under “No Parking Anytime” signs. I’ve seen people go so far as to pull up and drive a little on the sidewalk if they don’t like how slowly traffic is moving. Not to mention they are all the time cutting people off, running red lights, and just generally driving a like maniacs. I’m assuming it’s all acceptable because we are in backwards Arkansas. I’ll have a hard time adjusting to hard and fast REAL laws in West Virginia.
7) All the overweight people: I know this may seem like a weird thing to miss, but I haven’t been too concerned about losing weight because most of the people in Little Rock who are not hooked on crack or meth are AT LEAST my size. I don’t have to walk into any given situation and immediately feel like “the fat person” in the room. There will be at least five others bigger than me! I know this is not a healthy attitude to have, and of course I should want to be a healthy weight so I don’t die of some related disease. It just helps my self-esteem a little, in a crazy, completely fucked up way.
8) All the poor people: LMCAO (laughing my CRAZY ass off, for those who have forgotten) I know this is another weird thing to miss, but it was nice being around people who understood my financial situation. In Virginia, I always felt badly because I couldn’t do things that other people asked me to do. I probably wouldn’t have wanted to all the time anyway, but it really sucked to have to say no because I had no money. In Little Rock, there are other people counting pennies for gas. There are other people who go through the U-Scan at the grocery store so they won’t feel badly about taking their last $3.06 off their debit card. There are other people who have to sell their blood two times a week in order to eat or feed their dog.
Well, that’s it, I suppose. I really thought I could come up with AT LEAST ten. Oh well. Just like I have dumped people from my life for being mainly negative, I have been wanting to dump Little Rock for the same reason. Now I have that chance. On Thursday, November 22nd, I will be saying “Deuces!” to Little Rock as I watch it disappear in my rearview mirror. Naw, I won’t really be watching. I’ll be looking onward towards West Virginia.