The Story of Lil’ Deb

This is the story of a girl named Lil’ Deb.  Lil’ Deb was popular with the other little girls her age.  Upon first meeting her they thought she was friendly, knowledgeable, and adorably scatterbrained. As the other little girls got to know Lil’ Deb, they discovered that her friendly concern masked her nosiness and controlling nature. Upon meeting Lil’ Deb, it would appear that she was potential best friend material. It was soon uncovered that she asked questions about people’s lives not because she was a kind, caring person.  Lil’ Deb asked questions in order to learn the truth about her prey and twist the information to use against the other person. She would then use the facts of the person’s life that she charmed out of them as a tool to cut and reshape. She would ridicule the person for the things they said, did, and believed. She would make the other person feel so badly about themselves that they would change who they were just to get “sweet” Lil’ Deb to remove her claws. As soon as Lil’ Deb’s victim new friend stopped whatever it was that Lil’ Deb wanted them to change, Lil’ Deb would remove her claws, back off, and go back to being the sweet little girl she was upon first introduction.

Lil’ Deb’s victims friends would try to ignore the nasty Lil’ Deb that would make appearances. It became difficult when the reality behind Lil’ Deb’s “knowledge” was exposed. Lil’ Deb would use her knowledge as another means of controlling her victims friends. She would share the knowledge she had, and then crush the other person with that knowledge. She would bury them with useless information. It was soon learned that Lil’ Deb shared this knowledge to try and subtly manipulate her victims friends into doing what she wanted.  She would list reasons why they should change their lives and make decisions based on what Lil’ Deb wanted, and then make life so unbearable for her victims friends that they had no choice but to give in to her requests.

As people got to know Lil’ Deb, her adorable scatterbrained ways and forgetfulness did not seem quite so adorable.  Especially when she would fly into fits of rage at not being able to find her favorite lace doily come tea time.  She began screaming at her stuffed animals, demanding they help her find that lace doily.  She didn’t care that she was the one who didn’t put it back in the drawer after her last tea time; she expected her stuffed animals to drop everything and find it for her.  She would stomp around her bedroom, angry and frustrated till the doily was found.  As she happily skipped off to tea time with her victims friends, she left her stuffed animals behind, scared and shaking from the intensity they saw Lil’ Deb exhibit over something as small as not being able to locate a doily.

Eventually, Lil’ Deb’s victims friends became tired of being her victims.  They decided to stand up for themselves.  They told Lil’ Deb that her behavior was not acceptable, and they would not tolerate it anymore.  Lil’ Deb looked astonished and said she didn’t know what they were talking about.  She hadn’t done anything wrong.  The brave little children detailed her manipulative and controlling ways.  They told her how she always put them down and made them feel badly about themselves.  How she would pick and pick and pick until they finally changed what she found undesirable, only to then be told they still were not acceptable.  Lil’ Deb realized she could no longer play dumb and pretend she didn’t know her behavior was wrong.  She changed tactics.  Lil’ Deb started to defend her actions and explain why they were ok.

Lil’s Deb’s victims-no-more were astonished.  How could Lil’ Deb first deny that she did anything wrong, and then start to defend the horrible things she’s done?  She may not have killed or physically harmed anyone, but she left her victims-no-more devastated, invalidated, and feeling badly about themselves.  Her victims-no-more decided that Lil’ Deb was too toxic an influence on their lives, so they decided they would have nothing more to do with her.  They turned their backs and walked away as she stood staring after them, wondering how to get them back.

She decided to enlist the help of her stuffed animals to turn her victims-no-more back into victims her friends.  She went to her favorite pink unicorn with the glittery horn and long flowing hair.  She told her unicorn to go find her victims-no-more and to find out what she would need to do to turn them back into victims friends.

The stuffed unicorn came back and said that Lil’ Deb’s victims-no-more were unmoved, and not willing to give Lil’ Deb another chance.  The unicorn explained to Lil’ Deb that her victims-no-more had seen her true nature and knew that she was unwilling to change and did not  care about the sufferings of others.

Lil’ Deb sent a few other stuffed animals to talk to her victims-no-more, but the green giraffe and the blue polka dotted elephant told her the same thing the unicorn had told her.  Her true nature was exposed and her victims-no-more refused to be brought down by her.

Lil’ Deb decided that she needed to talk to her victims-no-more herself.  Obviously her stuffed animals were incompetent and would not know how to best bring her victims-no-more back and turn them into victims friends.  She knew, however, that her victims-no-more would not speak to her directly.  She wasn’t worried.  She knew she would think of a plan.  She was a crafty little girl, after all.

Lil’ Deb’s solution came to her one night while she was lying in bed, counting sheep so she could go to sleep (How else would she be able to sleep at night after what she’d done to people?).   Since her stuffed animals couldn’t get the job done, and no one would speak to her, Lil’ Deb was going to dress up like a stuffed animal.  That way, when she presented her argument, her victims-no-more would not realize it was her, but would still hear her words and be swayed.  She reasoned this would work because her victims-no-more were pretty stupid and gullible.  She’s been able to manipulate and trick them before.  She didn’t think there would be any challenge this time.

Lil’ Deb pulled up her plush alligator suit and zipped it up, concealing her true form and making her look like just another stuffed animal.  She made her way to the playground where her victims-no-more were playing.  She started getting close to them, and called out a greeting.  Immediately her victims-no-more knew it was her.  They knew it was Lil’ Deb in disguise.  She may have thought she was being cute and cunning, but her victims-no-more saw right through her ruse to pretend to be someone else to get them to talk to her.

This additional manipulation infuriated Lil’ Deb’s victims-no-more.  They considered picking up rocks and sticks and running her off.  Scaring her and hurting her so that she would never approach them again.  They decided that was too much effort, and Lil’ Deb just wasn’t worth it.  Instead, they packed up their toys and left the playground.  Lil’ Deb kept calling after them, but they didn’t even look back.  She couldn’t touch them anymore.  Her victims-no-more found another playground that Lil’ Deb didn’t know about and spent many a happy afternoon playing in the sun, unconcerned about the nasty little girl they used to be victims of friends with.  They were happier and better off once they removed the negative, soul-sucking ways of Lil’ Deb from their lives.

As for Lil’ Deb, she tells herself she was right.  She did no wrong, and those victims-no-more are just trying to be mean.  “They don’t play fair!”  She pouts to her stuffed animals.  Then she gathers her stuffed animals in her arms and pulls them towards her in a suffocating embrace.  “I’m not worried, though.  I have all of you!”  She says that, but in the back of her mind she knows she has been a terrible person and is responsible for the pain of her victims-no-more.  She will think about the hurt and damage she has caused them for the rest of her life.  However, Lil’ Deb’s victims-no-more will not think of her again.

Categories: Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, Life, Mental Illness, Relationships, Thoughts | Tags: | 3 Comments

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3 thoughts on “The Story of Lil’ Deb

  1. Pingback: More Trash and Bullsh*t « Struggling with BPD

  2. Pingback: All You Had to Do Was Pretend, Debbie « Struggling with BPD

  3. Pingback: Borderline Bipolar | Is Bipolar Hereditary

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